|
|
|
||||||
Our Missions Are Different — Our Purpose Is the Same
|
PRINT THIS ARTICLE |
|
Kathleen Alfiero |
I’m fortunate. I have a life-long friend who loves me unconditionally and wants the best for me always. We talk on the phone most mornings.
I met Maureen when we were in the eighth grade. If anyone was listening in on our calls today, they might think that we’re still middle-schoolers. We have the same intense enthusiasm for life that we had years ago! The focus of our conversations has changed, though we both still have quite a lot to say about clothes.
Maureen loves researching her family history. She tells me about the “new” relatives she’s found from generations ago—where they lived, what work they did, and how her current family life reminds her that history often does repeat itself, both in good ways and in ways we might not like. It’s her mission to sort out who she is and who she is becoming in the context of knowing about those important people who have come before her. She also helps many others research their family histories. I’m proud of her accomplishments. Maureen is the co-founder of the Irish Heritage Center in Portland, Maine.
I talk with Maureen about my own project. We go over the progress I’m making, and she listens to me as I explore aloud where I am with things and what my heart tells me are the most logical next steps. She asks good questions and graciously offers her insightful opinions. My mission is to use multi-media to tell positive and inspirational stories about the impact that teachers and other people who work in schools have on their students. My heart pounds excitedly when I’m thinking about my aspirations. Maureen, in turn, says she’s wildly happy when she’s on Ancestor.com.
Maureen and I have lots in common. For one thing, we both understand that the purpose of life is joy!
When we’re aware that our differences help the world to be a better place, we are more inclined to appreciate each other’s interests and passions. I’m not as involved with information about my family history as Maureen is, but because of Maureen’s passion, I now know quite a bit about where my family comes from. Luckily (as my father always said), I’m mostly Irish. I think that one of the best things to have come from Maureen’s research is that she discovered that she and I are close cousins! We’ve even traveled to Ireland together and met some wonderful people who are related to each other and share the same last names as Maureen and me—Coyne and Connolly. Sharing aspects of Maureen’s life has brought us both so much fun and joy!
Maureen loves sharing my dreams with me. She is keenly aware of the value of focusing on what is good about our educational system and how it’s important to tell the stories that uplift those people who care for our kids every day in our schools. She says I inspire her to be a better person. And, by the way, Maureen loves my son deeply and says that Rian is a great teacher because he models how to go for it!
Most of us tend to think that we’ll feel better from having everything we want out of life.Lots of people think they can’t have what they want, so they resist the natural inclination to hope and dream. They feel trapped and think that what they want doesn’t matter. They have difficultly knowing what their mission is because they believe that what they love to do or long to experience has to be put aside because of the need to support themselves and their families. Many people don’t often feel joy.
I have found that when I am compelled to find the solutions to things that concern me, it’s thrilling. It’s in the process of seeking answers that I find happiness. Sure, sometimes I feel bad. I get frustrated when things move slower with my project than I want. I anxiously check my phone for the all-important call to come in so that I know that things are going my way. I worry too much about having enough money. I allow someone else’s behavior to bother me. But with Maureen’s encouragement and inspiration, I now pay attention to my emotions and can go from feeling awful to feeling good relatively quickly.
I love that I have less tolerance for those uncomfortable feelings than ever before. I see when I’m trying to control the uncontrollable and benefit from just letting things be.
When I forget how to be happy and well, I know that I’ll be talking with Maureen soon. She knows that I have reasons to be joyful and that my challenges help me to get there. We encourage each other to appreciate what we have. We nudge each other in endless positive ways. Maureen and I have so much fun laughing at ourselves. Every laugh reminds us to lighten up because life isn’t as serious as we make it out to be! There’s so much we are called to do and even more to be delighted about!
Center for Empowered Leadership ®
Email: info@cfel.org
Phone: 1.609.259.7911